10 - Listening to Pain's Message for Change - Pain is Our Friend

Pain is often misunderstood, but our hosts invite you to see it as a friend that signals necessary changes and personal growth. By reframing your relationship with discomfort, you can cultivate a deeper understanding of your well-being.

• Importance of recognizing pain as a signal for care
• Embracing discomfort in labor and delivery for empowerment
• Chronic pain as an opportunity to reflect and seek help
• The connection between thoughts and physical pain experiences
• Prioritizing self-care amidst busy lifestyles for better health

Remember to listen to what pain is trying to tell you and take care of yourself.

Transcript

Giles: 0:03

Two nurses and a therapist walk into a bar. The nurse orders drinks, but the therapist opts for water with lemon, explaining she's the designated listener, calling all healthcare providers welcome to Two Nurses and a Therapist your podcast for raw truth and real relief. These hosts share a profound understanding about the mind that leads to a happier, healthier life. Imagine feeling more than okay, not just faking it, but truly thriving. This podcast isn't about band-aids. It's about learning what is not yet taught in nursing schools. But if we have anything to say about that, it will be because it makes a huge difference for the health of the helper. Meet your hosts Wendy Williams, tyson Larson and Laurie Carpenos. They've seen it all on the front lines and they're here to tell you you're not alone. So grab your beverage of choice and join us, because in this crazy world of healthcare we can all use friends. And they promise only 25 minutes for each weekly episode, sometimes less. This is Two Nurses and a Therapist. Let's listen in.

Wendy: 1:31

Hey, there, it's Wendy and Tyson, the two nurses Our therapist is not here with us today, but two nurses and we just want to talk today about pain being our friend. Tyson and I were just talking before we started, and I happen to be a chronic pain nurse and Tyson, you know I'm not sure what struck you about that, but pain is our friend is something I say every day, all day, to my patients is pain is our friend. Thank goodness you're in ongoing pain, chronic pain, because that way you wouldn't be talking to this medical group that can possibly have an impact on it for you. So there's the pain is our friend mode, and then the pain is scary and I don't like it and I don't want it and it frightens me and I'll do anything to make it shut up mode Right, and it frightens me and I'll do anything to make it shut up Right.

Tyson: 2:29

Yeah, and in labor and delivery it's amazing how much pain we can handle, when we accept it too, and what our bodies are equipped for, that we can't even imagine that we can endure, and slowing down and not adding to the pain by thinking it's the worst thing ever and fighting it and getting even more constricted. So, yes, pain is our friend. It can be an indicator as we were talking about before the show about something else going on that maybe we didn't notice before or maybe even a tad bit in denial of. But pain is going to show up and it's got a message for you. Absolutely yes.

Wendy: 3:22

Yeah, for you, absolutely yeah. So I went to. A lot of the patients I work with have arthritic pain like bum knees, bum hips et cetera, and they're so tired of it and so forth. But if you've got some sort of loss of cartilage in there and it really hurts to take a step, it might be a good idea not to be running on that, so that your bones that are touching one another might not crack quite so easily, right? So the pain is telling you to slow down and the pain is telling you I hate slowing down, so you might go seek some help, like some arthritis help et cetera. But the pain is helping you to slow down and not injure it further. And the pain is telling you we down and not injure it further. And the pain is telling you we need some support here, we need some help, you know.

Wendy: 4:12

So yeah, and what happens in this understanding that we're all about here, that we blather on and on and on and on and on about the inside out understanding, is that we can make up stories about the pain like, oh my gosh, I must have cancer, it's all downhill from here and we'll do anything to medicate it, or before we see Calip or whatever. As opposed to saying pain is our friend, oh, this hurts, let me sleep, let me see if I can sleep and I'll wake up, and if I still hurt, maybe I'll get some assistance, or so that's when we look at it. But if you're like or so, have somebody look at it, but if you're like, no, it can't hurt, I better drink it away, or cocaine in a way, or ignore it or overdose on Advil or whatever. And as opposed to seeing pain being our friend and what we can do sometimes is add to it by getting afraid or fearful or making up stories about what the pain means other than it's a signal that says excuse me, your right hip needs some attention, or whatever.

Tyson: 5:27

And it could be stop doing that. You get your hand on a hot stove, you're going to feel pain and you're like, oh, I'm not going to put my hand on the hot stove. So it could be telling you stop doing that as well. On a hot stove, you're going to feel pain and you're like, oh, I'm not going to put my hand on the hot stove. So it could be telling you stop doing that as well. You know, if you're running marathons and your knees are going up, it could be saying you know what, maybe it's time to back off the marathons or it's growing a little bit, or you know, sorry, there's your new assertivity and yeah, and also, pain is a part of life. You know, as a childbirth, you know it's just, it's what happens. You know it's going to be painful. Not be there is really making that pain worse.

Wendy: 6:22

Now, whenever you talk about childbirth I've not had the opportunity myself to have children but when you think about it, the last I heard there are 8 billion human beings on the planet.

Tyson: 6:33

That's a lot of labor and delivery pain. That is a lot.

Wendy: 6:38

I never thought of it that way. You know what I mean. But every single one of us came through in a way where somebody was going ouch right yeah.

Wendy: 6:48

So, like you say, it's just a natural part of. There's just no way of getting around it, I mean, unless you were knocked off over the head and you were unconscious the whole time you were delivering your child. But most of the time that's not happening, of course, is the cesareans and all that stuff. But the bottom line is that pain is a part of life and pain can be a friend. And when we over, when, when we misuse the power of our ability to think and we go in the direction of it hurts, something's wrong. I'm broken, this is bad. I need to stop the pain. As opposed to saying what is this pain trying to tell me, post is saying what is this pain trying to tell me? And stop the symptom of pain, because you're, like me, living with it or dealing with pain. You could be aborting a very important process in the body. Yeah, funny. Here they got two nurses and a therapist. We're talking to fellow healthcare providers. They're probably rolling their eyes with like no kidding, wendy and Tyson, fellow healthcare providers.

Tyson: 7:55

They're probably rolling their eyes with, like no kidding, wendy and Tyson Go ahead. What were you going to say? Oh, I was just going to say, you know, and it may very well just be, the pain might be indicating that you're overthinking too. Before I got introduced to the principles, I was at the chiropractor two to three times a week and then down to one week, and now I haven't been in months. They email me and ask me if I can come back and see them because it's been so long. And it was because I was carrying so much stress in my shoulders and my neck and, just you know, contorting my body, stressing my body out so much, I'd have to get it adjusted. But then I'd go back to my thinking and, you know, retighten up everything, I'd have to get it adjusted. I mean, you know that whole game. So once my thinking settled down, my body settled down too.

Wendy: 8:50

Oh, and I love hearing that. I love hearing that Just because it makes so much sense that you know cause. You're a mom of two teenagers and I have a busy life, and we all have busy lives, and so you're like I don't have time to have whatever it is, and so you might be holding on and it might not be a physical problem, but you might be like I don't have time to sit down and go crochet and enjoy my life. I have to keep going. I have to go pick the groceries, I have to make the dinner, I have to work with the kids, with their homework, I have to get my husband to the doctor's office, I have to do for me, and so you know, you just kind of keep, you just hold on to something.

Wendy: 9:33

And I can feel my shoulders right now. You can't see on the podcast show my shoulder up by my ear. You know you just. And so you, yeah, every once in a while go to a car park and having them iron out all those cramps in your, in your muscles and, and they wouldn't be there necessarily unless we were overthinking or or just the, the, the misuse of the power of thought sometimes can get in our way, yeah, and I still have all the things that I have to do, you know, in my life.

Tyson: 10:09

I still go to work, I still, you know, make dinner for my kids and I still run them to their place. I don't have as much thinking about it, I don't have. And then the extra layer of thinking of, you know, I'm a single mom and why me? And all of that, all of the extra thinking that used to come along with a lot of the things that I was doing, has settled.

Wendy: 10:36

Has settled. Is that great? I mean two or three times a week doing anything, so driving yourself to the chiropractor, driving home from the chiropractor, waiting and waiting for the chiropractor, paying the chiropractor because most insurances don't cover it. You have recouped so much time and money in your life by just understanding how the mind works and when. We misunderstood it all these years and said it's all about the things that are coming out at me and all about me dealing with external factors, rather than understanding that we feel our thinking 24, seven and what we're thinking is what comes out in our, in how we physically feel or how we behave. Uh, it's just been such a game changer for me and just hearing that story about your chiropractic that's like a huge amount of time and money.

Tyson: 11:34

It is yeah, yeah, yeah, and I'm still get the occasional headache or, you know, know, kink in my back, although when I need to, or take ibuprofen if I absolutely have to. But you know, it's much different now.

Wendy: 11:53

So I mean, I'm making up a story here, but maybe when you have the kinks in your back and the headaches, before you go, oh, that's right, I have a body that requires chiropractic. I have such a bad body, it just can't handle the life that I live. All woe is me, right. As opposed to going, oh, I have a kink in my neck or right now in my back, or I have a headache, I guess I'd better take a couple of Advil and go sit down and be quiet. I guess I better take a couple of Advil and go sit down and be quiet. Yeah, because my body just needs. It's telling me it needs to rest or stop or whatever, and so I'll do that and it will get back to normal. So pain is your friend as a potent, telling you that you're a broken, pathetic, middle-aged woman.

Wendy: 12:39

You're not, yes, right, and you're not even middle-aged yet, unlike myself, you know, spy well, I mean I'm gonna tell everybody how old I am, but I'm when I'm the nurse, I live in the greater new england area and I'm 66 years old and I feel I don't feel I don't even know what 66 is supposed to feel like, but I don't really feel like that. But I do know that pain is my friend. I've been acclimated with my friend pain much more in the last few years than I ever did in years before. But that's okay, it's all part of getting older, especially the knees oh man, the knees, I'm telling you.

Wendy: 13:21

But as I say to the patients that I talk to, like I say I talk to people with arthritis all the time. I'm like listen, how old are you? And they'll say 64 or whatever I say. Well, for 63 years your full body weight has been on those knees every day, all day. So it's okay that they're wearing out. So every once in a while I put up a mirror and go Wendy, it's okay. Well, pain's our friend. We thank you for listening. We're glad that two nurses and a therapist is up and running and we'll talk to you next time about being inside our understanding.

Tyson: 14:01

Yes, Thank you for joining us. And remember pain means you're friend. Listen to what it's fun to tell you. Slow down.

Wendy: 14:08

That's exactly right. All right, take care guys, I love you. Yes, all right, bye, bye. End recording.